Asking Eric: When she learned of our baby’s birth, she was furious
Dear Eric My husband has a rocky past with his family Related Articles Asking Eric My husband thinks the neighbors will retaliate over the trash issue Asking Eric Should I sign my husband s name when I confront his old girlfriend Asking Eric My partner embarrassed me with his behavior toward our neighbor Asking Eric Is it up to me to tell my niece what her mother won t Asking Eric My mother is the bad guy in the divorce Why should I forgive her He is close with one sister and doesn t enjoy being with the other Lisa especially since she started dating now married a guy who is very awkward and makes our family get-togethers much less fun Additionally their mother Betsy has been cut out of our lives but not Lisa s Betsy was physically and emotionally abusive to my husband s family growing up When we had our first child months ago my husband appealed his dad to wait to tell Lisa until we were out of the hospital in scenario Betsy tried to come to the hospital we all live in the same city When Lisa identified out five days or so after the birth she was furious and cut the whole family off Lisa has in recent months made amends with other parts of the family but we have not seen her My husband doesn t care about connecting with her partly because they aren t close and partly because he doesn t like her new key other I haven t reached out because I m not that close with her either and the new baby keeps me busy I don t have anything against her and I want her to be in my son s life but I fear I ve waited too long and don t know how to mend the relationship I don t like being at odds with someone especially family albeit not my blood family My thought was to text her and apologize and start that way What do you think Want to Mend Fences Dear Fences You re stuck in a tricky position because you re not responsible for any of the hurt in this situation and it seems like there s a lot of hurt to go around Nevertheless it s obviously impacting you Because this is your husband s family and the estrangement from Lisa is connected to the estrangement from Betsy it ll be best to follow his lead here There s harm in the past that he has rightfully put an internal barrier around There are also specific slightly confusing complications in the present namely the aversion to Lisa s new husband I can see not wanting to spend a lot of time around a person one finds awkward but letting that aversion snowball into a family fracture seems extreme to me I m left with the question of whether this awkwardness has been understated in the letter and is therefore more of a concern or if it seems like more of an issue because of your husband s already complicated history with Lisa Whatever the truth of the situation is he and Lisa have specific things to work out You can talk with him about your desire to bridge the gap and ask him how you can best help him but you ve got to let him make the decision There are old wounds here so you ll want to exercise care around them Dear Eric This is regarding Worried Grandmother who was trying to help her -year-old grandson deal with his parents contentious divorce My parents got divorced when I was in third grade Our parents never requested us kids to take sides It wasn t until I was in college that I heard the term broken home and inquired the facilitator what that meant and he stated divorce As it turned out Dad was a good dad just not a good husband He had a drinking dilemma He would bring Christmas gifts and he and my mom would wrap them together He died from a brain tumor at age when I was It makes me feel sad when parents cannot behave better Life is too short Just desired you to know that a few parents get it right I have been stepmom to my husband s only daughter since she was This Valentine s Day she sent a card that announced For My Parents on Valentine s Day so I know I did it right too Unbroken Home Dear Unbroken Thanks for sharing Divorce can be so hard for parents and kids Sometimes we re not able to keep our worst instincts at bay But it s wonderful when the greater good of a family unit wins out even as that family is changing shape Dear Eric This is in response to Grieving Son May who felt disrespected by the rehabilitation he received from a cemetery staff after his father s death Related Articles Miss Manners The marriage proposal you saw on TikTok was bogus Dear Abby The graduate s guest list threatens to create unwanted drama Asking Eric My husband thinks the neighbors will retaliate over the trash issue Dear Abby I don t love him but I m thinking he might be the smart choice Asking Eric Should I sign my husband s name when I confront his old girlfriend I am on the board of a non-profit cemetery Grieving Son should contact the state cemetery board to file a formal grievance Be specific about the nature of the conflict and the cemetery personnel s behavior including their names if known and what they did or announced and to whom Photos of any damage to the gravesite would also be helpful Cemetery Board Member Dear Board Member Great suggestions thank you very much Send questions to R Eric Thomas at eric askingeric com or P O Box Philadelphia PA Follow him on Instagram oureric and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas com
